The clitoris is one of the body parts that just doesn’t get talked about, so you can only imagine my delight in seeing a New York Times article that focuses on the clitoris. As a sex therapist, people love to talk about sex with me. When I mention this part of my work, it either seems to embarrass the hearer or permits them to talk about things they never mention.
Such was the case the other night over dinner. Some fellow volleyball parents and I were getting a bite to eat after the game. The mention of my work inspired another mom to lean over the table, as people do, and generalize what I must see in the therapy room. The usual assumption is often that in heterosexual relationships, it is the man that is not attending to the woman’s pleasure during sex. While that may be true in some cases, I find that it is just as often true that the woman is uncomfortable with the focus on her pleasure. This article on the clitoris explains part of what’s going on.
Sex education doesn’t include much about it. Doctors don’t seem to consider it, and most women aren’t told much about it. Over a lifetime of OB-gyn visits, the entire area is shielded from us as it is examined. The call here for increased study and consideration is long overdue and appreciated.