Infertility is a difficult burden to carry.
And unlike other traumatic events in your life, few people can understand the sense of loss that people experience when they realize they can’t build a family, at least not the way they wanted.
In this article, we’ll explore some of the ways in which your marriage might be tested while coping with infertility, and what you can do about it.
Don’t try to push your partner to look into adoption
In some cases, your partners will never be ready for adoption.
Many people have this deep desire to have their children that carry their DNA. As a result, adoption sounds like a weak substitute for their dream.
In this case, you need to have a talk with your partner about your future together without children and what it will look like financially and emotionally.
Lack of meaning
Many couples go through an existential crisis when they find out they can’t have children. They ask themselves what they will do with their free time while all of their friends are raising children.
What activities will add meaning to your life and a sense of satisfaction despite not having children?
Joining a cause or becoming an activist is just one the ways you and your partner can bring more meaning to your life and enjoy the time you spend together.
Don’t blame yourself for your health issues
In some cases, only one partner has fertility issues, and this often makes everything more complicated.
Questions such as “ Wouldn’t be my spouse happier with someone who can conceive?” may arise.
In this case, you have to accept that some aspects of your health can’t be controlled by you or your spouse, and in the end, you need to have a conversation with your partner about their expectations.
Instead of being tortured about questions that threaten your self-worth, ask your partner what a family with no children means to them and whether this is a deal breaker.
Otherwise, you might be putting yourself down for nothing. There are cases where partners decide they don’t want to be in a marriage without children, but most of the time, the love is strong enough on its own and not having kids won’t damage the relationship.
Wrapping up
Is your relationship with your partner becoming more and more strained as time goes by?
Ask a professional about some of the ways you can heal together, as a couple, from the damage done by infertility.